My past is a huge part of me, particularly because it’s filled with struggles and obstacles that I’ve learned to accept (now). And all I kept hearing was Dina’s voice saying, “Trust Yourself.” See I was able to tune everything out, including my always-thinking mind, and listen to my heart. Despite the passerbys and sounds of frantic drivers, I felt like the city was mine to enjoy some peace & (as much) quiet (as possible). For that 60-75 minute walk through street lights and raindrops, I found myself overcome with serenity. On Wednesday night, I opted to walk home from Michelle’s for some alone time with Chicago. I’ve begun viewing this past week as a necessary time for reflection. Remind me that I’m older, to be brave, smart, sweet, and bolder. I trust that I know myself well enough to ignore the doubts & cynicism and go after everything my heart desires. I, Kristen Medica, have grown enough to (finally) whole-heartedly Trust Myself. Despite having doubts & fears plague my past, I’m happy to report that part of my life is over.

I’ve been betrayed by ‘friends’ victimized by high school politics battled anxiety for most of my life and suffered from life-alternating heartbreak. I hate to admit this but life has made me a bit cynical. Now I’m keeping our conversation between the two of us, though I will share a two-word phrase, spoken by Dina, which is one I will continue to carry with me, “Trust Yourself.” While I enjoyed an evening (with mimosas) with Michelle, Kristen, and the kids (Max and Keira), it was my time with Dina after work that really changed my perspective on the matter that was draining me.

Wednesday was a jam-packed day- in a good way- and also the day that turned my emotions around. However, I will report that I’m feeling much better since my last post and, for me, that’s what matters the most. I’ve crammed so much into these last few days that I’ll fail to remember it all. If someone were to ask me how my week went then I might very well have to plead the fifth.

Be brave be smart